Dieting can be a nightmare. Even more so when oneself is so delusional that you think you’re dieting when you are actually doing anything but.
I like good food. I like healthy food. Unfortunately, I eat my healthy food and then…I get hungry. An insatiable hunger, with which I find myself eating double the amount I just ate, and nothing but rubbish food. And that hunger, it never seems to fully leave. Its not always so bad. Sometimes, I can almost manage to get through 1-2 days of healthy eating. But then, the hunger returns…
I keep telling myself that I eat like this
But then I realise that I’m actually eating like this
Somedays, I am able to look in the mirror and convince myself to just accept myself the way I am. To instead focus on leading a happy and healthy life, instead of being so focused on my weight. This is an amazing feeling of freedom and self-love. Unfortunately, the moment I can’t fit into my clothes, or I find myself too embarrassed to get into a swimsuit around friends, that self-hating, diet demanding, stress monster returns in bright colours.
I don’t want to be that blogger who complains. That isn’t me. But, challenges happen. It’s life. I know there has to be a compromise with this thing somewhere. Its so silly, no? All of this energy because of what we see in the mirror? If I put that energy into something else, I would see results immediately. So how am I fighting….myself? So odd.
Is it just me?